What happens when…

For a while I thought my chest would burst and my lungs would fall out on the asphalted road. The excruciating pain just beneath the ribs on the right side was increasing. My throat was parched and I longed intensely for a drop of water. My knees became so weak that I let my feet lead me rather than me taking control. Even the cold breeze engulfing me couldn’t suppress the countless rivulets on my face. Panting like a dog, I stuck out my tongue in vainly to moisten my lips. My breathing became so noisy; I thought people would come out of their homes to see what’s happening.

I’m not describing the latest in my nightmare series. After spending months, pondering over ‘jogging’, finally I’ve started it. And Oh! My friends, my dear friends…

Please don’t mistake me. I’m a humble person (*ahem*) and I always keep myself down to earth. So please don’t view it as an effort to get six pack abs in order to flaunt it. See, I don’t have anything against six pack abs or the guys who flaunt it. Even I too desire it sometimes, but the only condition is that God has to come down from his ivory tower. Yes, he should visit me and then make me into shape first, before fixing those ready made stuff on my tummy. Don’t you think that it would be bizarre to have six pack abs on an otherwise plump body?

It has been quite some time I started to think about fitness. I’d certain previous experiences too in this regard. Yeah, once I, along with a couple of friends joined a gym. There was no such thing as proper instructions, and I, in my vigorous attempt to look like Van Damme (Inspired by his flicks Universal Soldier, Double Impact and the likes) lifted almost anything available. The result was pretty quick. Just within 2 days I had needed my mother’s help to wear a shirt. It was not possible to keep my hands properly and I kept it as if I had blisters in my armpit. My friends thought I had developed ‘wings’ within such a short period and almost recommended my name to the ‘Limca Book of Records’.

Now, it’s common knowledge that a cat once fell in hot water would be scared even at the sight of water which is not dangerous in ‘character’. So it’s not just uncharted waters that makes one scared. I can hear some one grumbling out there: “Can’t you make it short, moron?” Indeed, let me try.

So off we went, me and a colleague to the nearest mall and purchased a couple of tracksuits, Ts, shoes… just all the paraphernalia to start the ‘fitness journey’. And I started it as stipulated, without fail. The actual plan was to hit the main road and run to the next town, that’s a couple of kilometres away, and come back. I had inspected the road on Sunday and found some potholes, ignorable I decided. But then, on Sunday evening I found a new route that zigzagged around the township I stay. I opted for it since it seemed better and safer than the other. Plan was that: ‘I run to the destination and come back without stopping anywhere and thus burn enough calories to look fit’. So, the stretch, that lay approximately 4 kilometres up and down, was finalised for my ‘fitness yatra’.

I got up at 5.30 and thud the alarm to silence which was buzzing so damn viciously. After trying to get adjusted with the fact that I woke up so early, I started my morning chores. Then with the enthusiasm of a kid who goes for an excursion I wore it all and moved out. ‘Slowly but steadily’ I murmured myself, and by the time I completed some 300 metres I thought I would die, short of breath. I finished the first day running, walking, and sometimes almost crawling. And the worst part of it was yet to come.

By afternoon the first results of jogging started to appear in forms of pains in different areas; shoulder, arms, calf muscles, ribs, abdomen and even neck. But the severest of them all was what I felt in the thighs. Ouch! It hurts with my every move and it hurts like hell especially when I had to use steps. (This is exactly what happens when couch potatoes become fitness freaks). And I had a tough time convincing myself that ‘no pain, no gain’.

It’s been 6 days since I started it, and uninterrupted it has been, so far. The pain has mostly been disappeared and the whole process makes me feel good. But it doesn’t mean that it’s easy or smooth. The temptation to remain in bed is just as strong as on the first day, but every morning I make myself get out of the cosy warmth of my bed, warding off sleep and laziness.

PS. Tomorrow I will take a break as it’s Sunday. "AND GOD RESTED ON THE SEVENTH DAY FROM ALL HIS WORKS”. Me too, the lesser mortal.